The Waubaunsee County (KS) Sheriff’s Office is warning out-of-county visitors coming to the area for an outdoor symphony concert to not drive down a local farm road as recommended by their GPS systems.
“DO NOT LISTEN TO YOUR GPS & TAKE HEADWATERS ROAD TO THE CONCERT, YOUR GPS IS A LYING LIAR THAT LIES!!!,” the agency wrote in a Facebook post that has been viewed more than 4 million times, according to the Topeka Capital-Journal.
“I just drove HEADWATERS ROAD in my Sheriff's F-150 & I barely made it out with intact vertebrae. Folks if you try, you better know WHAT IS UP because if you don't, not even Johnnie Cochran will be able to get you out of that soft tire & suspension DESTROYING sweetness that is HEADWATERS ROAD,” the sheriff wrote.
The comical post emphasizes that the sheriff’s office has placed signs to help people find the concert venue and avoid the farm road. “Please follow the VERY VISIBLE & HELPFUL signs we've put up to divert you.”
The tongue-in-cheek message includes references to caricatures of the people who attend the concert.
“Jan, in the triple locked Range Rover, (who doesn't know what a locking differential is), please follow the VERY VISIBLE & HELPFUL signs we've put up to divert you...AROUND the hazard that is HEADWATERS ROAD. Jerry & your quarter century younger 5th trophy Wife in the yellow Lambo, follow the (SO INCREDIBLY VISIBLE YOU CAN PROBABLY SEE THEM FROM SPACE) helpful signs we've put up to divert you around the ROCKY AGONAL HELLSCAPE that is HEADWATERS Rd,” the statement says.
Finally, the statement says, “If you do get stuck we'll come save you. We'll also make fun of you the entire time.”
The announcement was posted on June 10, the day that the 18th annual Symphony in the Flint Hills was held near Eskridge.