POLICE Logo
MenuMENU
SearchSEARCH

Fire Nobody!

Here is the conundrum: When bad things happen it appears Officer Nobody has failed again to do what needs to be done, and when things turn out good, Dep. Somebody is taking all the credit. Something needs to be done.

August 4, 2013
Fire Nobody!

Illustration by Sequoia Blankenship.

I have finally had it with Nobody. I know that sounds harsh, but I simply can't take it anymore. Nobody has got to go. Gentle crime fighting readers I know you think me a very tolerant and low-key fellow, but Nobody has managed to get my goat, not to mention the rest of my barnyard.

"What happened?" you ask. Well, I was just working on my PowerPoint and checking the links to my videos and I played a classic video of a suspect in custody that had shot and critically wounded a deputy, had been arrested by a local agency then transported by two different transport units. Once at the jail, the only one armed in the interrogation room turned out to be the suspect. After several taboo words, one investigator turns to the other and says, "Nobody shook him." Nobody again? 

Ad Loading...

This Nobody guy is one worthless cop and I think it is time we dumped him. Time and again I read an officer killed or injured summary and there he is.  Nobody backed her up; Nobody checked the attic; Nobody put out flares; Nobody cuffed the suspect; and on and on. That darn Nobody has got to go. So often in critical situations, Nobody does the things we know are basic officer safety steps. If he can't handle the job, it is time to assign Somebody. Somebody seems a lot more competent, and often I hear how Somebody jumped in and took control during the confrontation or Somebody was able to get the road closed before an officer got hurt.

The only problem I have is when I call an agency or department where Somebody has done a great job I find it is a mistake. Invariably Somebody got the credit when, in reality, an Officer Johnson, or a Deputy Elmwood, or a Trooper Jackson actually did the good deed and saved the day.

So here is the conundrum: When bad things happen it appears Officer Nobody has failed again to do what needs to be done, and when things turn out good, Dep. Somebody is taking all the credit. Something needs to be done.

Sure, I know exactly what you are thinking: "I think it is the sergeant's job to make sure things don't end up being assigned to Nobody." That is exactly the kind of thinking that gets Nobody involved and everyone hoping Somebody saves the day. You cannot put your safety and well-being in the hands of others, not even your Sergeant.

In psychological terms, this is called "locus of control," the way you view your control over your life and destiny. Do you put the center of control for your life in the hands of others? Is it the sergeant's job to keep you safe or Officer Somebody's job to swing by and check on one of your squad mates during a traffic stop, but not yours? That's exactly how Officer Nobody got the assignment; you were expecting Somebody, just not you, to do it.

I don't care if you are a rookie or 30-year veteran, it isn't Somebody's job to take care of you, to make sure your fellow warriors have backup, to search your prisoner effectively, it is yours! That is how we get rid of Nobody. We take care of ourselves and our brothers and sisters. We don't expect Somebody to do it: We do it. We think about the risks and balance them: slicing the pie on searches, always aware on a traffic stop, maintaining our fitness and all the other tasks so essential for effective and safe law enforcement. It is not Somebody's job, it is your job.

Ah, but now you are thinking, "Good points but there is one more person out there who should be responsible for safety. Everybody" 

"Touché!" Except I find when Everybody takes an assignment, Nobody ends up doing it. So now we have gone full circle. That worthless Nobody ends up assigned to the most critical elements of our safety.

So here it is: Officers Nobody, Somebody, and Everybody are truly not responsible for our safety or the safety of others, each of us is. And when we put that responsibility right in the center of our spirit, our locus of control, we find we are not only safer but happier.

Dave Smith is an internationally recognized law enforcement trainer and is the creator of "JD Buck Savage." You can follow Buck on Twitter at @thebucksavage.

Ad Loading...
Subscribe to our newsletter

More Patrol

black background width image of police lights in middle and headline Dashcam Video Officers rescue Man from Burning Car
PatrolNovember 17, 2025

Dashcam Video Shows Officers Rescue Man from Burning Car

Dashcam video released by a New Jersey police department shows two of its officers rescuing an unconscious man from a burning car after a crash.

Read More →
blue background with image of a red dot sight and also second image of the red dot on a handgun lower right
PatrolNovember 17, 2025

Aimpoint COA optic + A-CUT Named Red Dot of the Year

The Aimpoint COA optic + A-CUT system has been named Red Dot of the Year by Guns & Ammo magazine. The new optic system was introduced in January 2025.

Read More →
Thumbnail for video series POLICE From the Show Floor, with headline text featuring Axon
Patrolby Wayne ParhamNovember 16, 2025

From the Show Floor: Axon

Join POLICE as we visit with Abi Stock, of Axon, to learn about the company’s latest technology offerings, such as Axon Assistant, Form One, and the DFR integration with Skydio.

Read More →
Ad Loading...
side view of a ballistic helmet in studio setting, black background, with sparks and smoke
PatrolNovember 16, 2025

Back Face Deformation, Brain Injury and Ballistic Helmets – Why the “Dent Doesn’t Matter” Claim Ignores Science

Alex Poythress, co-founder and CEO of Ballistic Armor Co., explains why ballistic helmet buyers should insist on full test data, including BFD measurements, standoff distance, and padding configuration, rather than rely solely on penetration ratings.

Read More →
Pink Streamlight Wedge XT flashlight.
PatrolNovember 13, 2025

Streamlight Marks 15 Years of Support for Breast Cancer Research Foundation With $20k Donation

In its 15th year of supporting the Breast Cancer Research Foundation, Streamlight donated $20,000 to help in the fight against cancer. Donations were generated through the sale of special Wedge XT models and other pink flashlights.

Read More →
center circle image of PTSD Help Expanded surrounded by military and first responder images
PatrolNovember 11, 2025

Police-Led Mental Health Charity Expands to Include Veterans

Talk To Me Post Tour (TTMPT), a non-profit organization that has been providing peer-support programs and professional psychological support for first responders, is now expanding services to military veterans.

Read More →
Ad Loading...
police officer holding a folded flag and headline for Officer Killed
PatrolNovember 10, 2025

WakeMed Campus Police Officer Killed in Hospital Shooting

A WakeMed Campus Police Officer died after being shot in the lobby of the emergency department at a North Carolina hospital over the weekend.

Read More →
Black background with blue graphic outline of state of Florida and headline Video Released: barricaded Suspect Falls Through Ceiling and Into SWAT Custody.
PatrolNovember 10, 2025

Video Shows Barricaded Suspect Fall Through Ceiling and Into SWAT Custody

Deputies in Indian River County, Florida, apprehended a suspect after he fell through the ceiling with SWAT members waiting below. The sheriff’s department released video of the apprehension.

Read More →
thumbnail for video series POLICE From the Show Floor featuring T2 Systems.
Patrolby Wayne ParhamNovember 10, 2025

From the Show Floor: T2 Systems

Learn about T2 Systems and its electronic parking enforcement solutions. Retired Chief John Holland outlines the benefits of using such a system to manage parking enforcement.

Read More →
Ad Loading...
view of a mobile observation trailer deployed in a parking lot against a blue sky
Patrolby Wayne ParhamNovember 10, 2025

Texas Police Department Adds Reconview Tower

A Texas police chief shares how the Decatur Police Department will use its new Reconview observation tower.

Read More →