In the peaceful, crime-free democratic country of South Africa (you know, the latest "workers' paradise"), crime is so rampant that the crooks are running out of victims to rob. Recently, the government even decided to stop mailing pension checks because so many old folks were getting' koshed and robbed outside the banks where they cashed 'em.

So they instituted the brilliant policy of sending bundles of cash out to area police stations, so recipients could come in and get their bucks at a safe, secure place. Good thinkin', huh?

That worked for a couple of weeks, until two balaclava-masked dudes with pistols waltzed into police headquarters in Northern Cape Province, got the drop on all officers present, and robbed the cops.

The Daring Duo got away clean with about 370,000 rand - about $50,570 US. Nobody chased 'em because "responding officers" were, ummm..."tied up." Disarmed, too.

Strange, the Victims All Have These Little Smiles

Cops in Bogota, Colombia, are having a tough time wrapping up the last members of a criminal gang. The newspapers love this gang, the people like reading about 'em, and even the victims don't seem too angry about their losses.

In the media, this crime wave is known as "The Taste Me Robberies," and these not-quite-hardened gangsters are called "The Lollipop Lovelies." All the gang members are described as very attractive, "gifted" young women in their late teens and early twenties. They hang out around ritzy bars and restaurants, hook up with well-heeled business dudes, and once they're in the schmuck's car, whip off their blouses and invite the guys to "taste me."

So far, the cops haven't heard of any refusals. After a couple minutes of presumed bliss, the next thing the victims know is that time has passed, and they're sitting in a deserted place without cars, wallets, watches, jewelry, or plausible stories for their wives. One thing the police couldn't figure out was why, after a flurry of publicity, guys were still falling for the Lollipops.

Finally, after three of the girls were captured, police learned they had gotten hold of some very strong narcotic capsules, and were mixing them into a liquid solution which they painted on their breasts. And after evaluating the suspects, they kinda guessed the reason why the "victims" weren't too angry.